Matthew
18:15-20 & Romans 13:8-14
Loving
of Neighbor
I
made it over to the football game last night.
Parking cars in the church’s two lots is a real killer when it comes to
actually going to the games. The students
do the work, but I feel the need to be with them. We get here around 7:30 am to prevent folks
from just showing up and parking in one of the reserved spots.
But
I went over last evening. For a number
of reasons. Among them, to see how our
fans would respond to the Auburn fans.
SEC Teams have a reputation – as do some ACC Teams. And with the hype of previous national
championships – I wondered if we would expose our good side, or an ugly side.
Being
at peace with those around us means we have to get along – not simply in ideal
situations but in the ones that are a little more challenging. Anyone can be nice, and civil, and welcoming
when things are going great.
The
measure of one who bears the mark of Christ is the ability to be Christ-like in
the worse of situations. Jesus knew that
there would be times when our Christian love would be put to the test. He knew that we would need a lot of
encouragement and some sound advice if we were to continue to be the persons
that he hoped we would be.
Jesus
said to the disciples: "If
another member of the church sins against you." In what follows, I believe Jesus is giving us
more than practical advice on conflict resolution. It isn't Gospel if it is something we
could have just as easily read in an issue of Family Circle. Jesus speaks of what to do when a fellow
Christian sins against us - of how we continue to honor the name and look into
the face of one whom we claim as brother/as sister.
It
may be helpful to borrow a concept from our second reading for this
morning. If you look once more at that
reading from Paul’s letter to the church at Rome, in the opening verse, you
hear Paul reciting these words: "Owe
no one anything, except to love one another." "Owe no one anything", he
says, "except to love one another." Paul turns love into a debt - a debt which he
implies can never be repaid. In this
thirteenth chapter, Paul has just finished speaking of one's duty
to the governing authorities. In the
verses which immediately preceded this morning's reading, Paul gave
instructions on the importance of paying one's taxes and giving one's support
to the governing authorities. "You
do all these things," he says, "because it will enable you to live
peacefully in the land."
But
then Paul turns his attention to a particular code of behavior, to a set of
expectations which apply specifically to those who are followers of
Christ. It is here that he speaks of owing
a debt of love.
Those
of you who know me, know that I am not inclined to separate the Christians from
the non-believers. I do not believe that
Paul is wanting to do this either. I
believe his point to be that in Christ we have been given the opportunity to
break free from all those disagreements and divisions. In Christ, we are presented a model for
honorably remembering the name and proudly looking into the face of those with
whom we have had terrible disagreements.
This
isn't a page out of Family Circle, or something that is covered in Psych
101. The Gospel tells us how we survive
the injustices which others force upon us, the sins committed against us.
The
advice that Jesus gives is good solid advice.
Regardless of whether we are part of the church, the process he outlines
can prove helpful. His proposed first
step in conflict resolution is to go to the person, one-on-one and talk the
situation through. I hate to think how
many long-standing feuds could have been avoided had the initial parties sat
with each other and talked through their differences. It is good advice, probably found in more
than one introductory text book. But
consider for a moment the increased likelihood of success when we not only go
to the person - but go mindful of the debt of love owed to them.
Jesus'
resolution principals have as their goal something more than setting aside the
conflict. Successful resolution involves
regaining that one. We do
more than settle our differences; we reclaim as sister/as brother the one we
have been in danger of losing.
Similarly,
the second step outlines a procedure by which we are able to reclaim the one
from whom we have become separated. "If
you are not listened to," Jesus says, "take one or two others
along with you." The others
are not simply individuals who will be inclined to see our side of the
story. They are other members of the church;
others who also owe this debt of love - to you and to the person with whom you
are having the conflict.
It
is interesting to me that Jesus calls them witnesses. They are witnesses as opposed to say - judges. There is a difference between bearing
witness to a conversation and being called upon to judge between
adversaries. A witness bears testimony
to the truth of what transpires. A
witness allows us to see what actually takes place.
Before
closing out, I feel it is important to call attention to the last two verses of
our Gospel lesson. These are often
repeated words, but they are most often repeated out of context. Jesus says, "Truly I tell you, if any
two of you agree on earth about anything you ask, it will be done for you by my
father in heaven." The context
for this comment is this whole conversation on sinning against each other. The immediately preceding verses speak of
binding and loosening the grip of sin.
Surely, where two or three are gathered...(Christ is) there among
them. But it may not be the
intention of this often quoted verse to assume that whatever two
of us ask for - God will do. This verse
was not intended to be a magic wand, enabling us to receive whatever it is that
our hearts desire. Jesus is speaking of
effects of the combined testimony of witnesses.
He is talking about agreement with regard to conflict resolution.
There
will always be conflict, and there will be differences of opinion. Not everyone could leave the football stadium
last night, feeling victorious. When
conflict arises, we can choose how we will handle it. We can allow it to fester and spread, or we
can address it and see that it handled properly. There are any number of guides to conflict
resolution and I have read many such articles in Family Circle or Psychology
Today. But, there is a separate set
of instructions for those of us who acknowledge Christ as our role model. We are called upon to face such conflict
forever mindful of the debt of love owed to the one whom Christ has also forgiven. We are, after all, as Martin Luther so
eloquently put it – One hopeless soul in the ditch trying to help another
hopeless soul out. Hopeless, that is,
unless we accept Christ’s help.
Amen.
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